A Savage Kinda Love Read online

He kissed me again while walking us back over to the couch.

  "What are you doing?" I whispered as he lowered me to the cushions.

  "I can't make it back up there with how I'm feeling about you right now."

  "But..."

  He shoved himself between my legs and removed his shirt in silence, only offering up a devilish grin to show that I had been heard, but wasn't actively being listened to.

  As I lifted my hands to his stomach, he encircled my wrists and lifted them above my head, pressing them into the pillows, pinning me to the point that I was completely unable to move.

  My God.

  I desired every second of it while craving for so much more.

  He lowered his body on top of mine and while keeping me in place, rolled his tongue across my lips and grinded his cock. I turned my head aside and exhaled while calling out to him in a low whimper. "Please, Nikko..." He dragged his lips across my jawline and sucked my skin until it nearly bruised, then removed a hand from one of my wrists to reach down for my pants, unbuttoning, unzipping... I yanked my other wrist from his grip, unable to remain still beneath him, and helped push down my pants and underwear until they slipped past my ankles and fell beneath my feet.

  He pulled back for a few seconds to stare down at me, his eyes shining, drinking me in until there was damn near nothing left to take; then he reached for my face, turning it back to him and slightly squeezed my cheeks; my lips puckered as he kissed me again while removing his own pants and briefs.

  I wrapped my hands around his face to stare up at him as a man I knew I still wanted but had become so fearful to have and lose. Because if he went through with what he felt needed to be done to my father, where would it lead us together?

  How the hell would it all end?

  Wanting this man meant the possibility of losing so much more of myself and those around me than I ever could've imagined.

  But I still couldn't bring myself to stop no matter the dire consequences surrounding us.

  The heart wants what it wants; mine wanted nothing more from me than pain.

  "What are you thinking about, baby? Right this very goddamn second?" he questioned, lifting his hand to my hair, brushing it behind my neck. "I can tell from that sharp look in your eyes that it might be something I need to know."

  "I don't... I don't know," I said, scanning his face as I shook my head against the cushions. "I just... what I'm feeling for you right now, I don't want it to change."

  "I don't either... We could keep the shit going."

  "What do you mean?"

  "After the money's split," he said. "Once everybody's gotten what the fuck they want outta this deal; once my old man is locked up--"

  "And mine is dead."

  "Baby..."

  "I'm sorry. I know what I said and meant all of it, but..." His entire face changed, darkened in response to my words. "I need to go."

  After rolling away from him and returning to my feet, I quickly got dressed as he watched my every move, and hurried down the hall.

  "Chey!" He called after me while yanking on his pants, then scurried to the door before I could reach it and lifted his hands to stop me from moving further.

  "What is it?"

  "Before you go, baby, I need to hear the same fuckin' words you told me before we started moving..." He stopped. "Tell me again that you're gonna come back to me, Cheyenne."

  "I am," I told him. "I'm coming back." He snaked an arm around my waist, jerking me to him. I yelped but was at a loss for words as soon as his lips met mine again and he slid his tongue against my own while making sure I could feel absolutely nothing else but him. "My God, Nikko, please."

  I returned the kiss, too helpless to do otherwise, providing one deep enough to stop myself from breathing, then pulled back and shuffled around him to reach for the door.

  He took my hand inside of his own while turning to me, then brought it to his mouth and kissed the back of my fingers. "I'm tasting you again tonight," he said. "No matter what the fuck happens."

  I stared up into his face and smiled as the sensation of his touch and the way he said those words to me sent my heart racing behind my ribs. "I'll be back soon."

  He bent forward to kiss me one last time before I moved outside and headed straight to my car.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Wasted Fortitude

  I yanked my keys from the ignition and hopped out of the car, then glanced at the string of red and white lights hanging from the roof of the club.

  "Great."

  I realized in the moment that they were now in deep preparation for one of their usual "pussy parties" tonight, which meant that variations of half-dressed women from all over the city and beyond it, as well as gallons of 90 proof vodka shipped in through barrels from other charters would soon be flowing in and out of the clubhouse until dawn, and was glad to show up and be out long before it started.

  After moving inside, I dropped my keys into my pocket and stopped at what sounded like a pair of fists slamming against the wall behind the bar.

  When the door shut behind me, I reached for my cell in a panic and hollered out. "HELLO?!"

  "Who is it?!" a woman's sharp voice returned from an uncertain distance. "If you're looking for Snake--?"

  "I'm not," I called back. "I'm--"

  "If you're looking for Nix or a few of the others, they aren't here. And the bar isn't open just yet, honey!"

  "I know that part, thanks!" I scanned the freshly mopped floor and wrinkled my nose. "I need to talk to the Tasmanian Devil -- Have you seen him out here at all today?"

  "You mean Malcolm?"

  "Sure," I spat. "That too. I tried calling his cell, but there's been no answer."

  A low chuckle followed before she responded. "He's not out here right now either, honey, making a run or something for the boys. Who the hell is it out there?"

  "Who the hell is it back there?!" I snapped back. "So far, all I'm getting is a loudmouth from behind a wall."

  "I could say the same!"

  I scoffed and narrowed my eyes as a petite, small waisted woman with dark brown eyes and medium brown skin, jet black hair floating down the center of her back and red heels that never managed to make her look any taller than I was in being 5'5, finally stepped into the room from the hallway.

  She grinned.

  I gagged.

  "Oh my God."

  It was Deborah Fairbanks. Malcolm's mother.

  "Hey there, Cheyenne." She adjusted her bright white, almost see-through tube top that barely kept her breasts in place before tugging at the hem of her pink, pleather skirt. "I didn't know that was you on the other side of this wall--"

  "I bet you didn't."

  "You didn't seem to recognize my voice either--"

  "And why the hell would I when I thankfully haven't heard it in God knows how long?"

  She snickered and stepped forward, opening her arms for a hug. I remained in place as she tried pulling me into her chest and patting my back. "I know this has been tough for you, but... I know about Rox," she muttered against my ear in a low voice. "And I'm sorry to hear--"

  I jerked from her grip before she could say another word and stood back. "What exactly did you hear from anyone outside of your son?"

  She looked to the corner of the club and lifted her shoulders. "I know that Snake had him locked up for stealing this time. Though, Malcolm isn't the one who mentioned it to me."

  "Where the hell is he -- When did he leave?"

  "I'm not exactly sure."

  "You don't know if it was right before I showed up or if he had been gone for awhile before now?"

  She frowned. "No."

  "Of course not." I spun away from her and moved toward the door.

  "Wait, Cheyenne--!"

  "What the hell is it?" I stopped mid-turn and whirled back around to her.

  She darted her eyes toward one of the couches and sucked in a breath. "I also know about what happened to Marleena."

  "And? Do
you know who the hell had her attacked or why they would've done it?"

  "I don't have any idea who might be behind that or why, but--"

  "What the hell do you want, Deborah?"

  "For us to start fresh."

  I chortled. "And how the hell do you expect for that to happen after all this time and our history?"

  "With your forgiveness," she said. "Finally. It's evident that you still hate me for whatever reason--"

  "You expect my forgiveness when you can't even remember why the hell I've never been able to tolerate you in the first place? Pretty rich."

  "Cheyenne." She placed her hands in front of herself and stepped toward me. "I'm asking your forgiveness so that I can also have your understanding."

  "Of what?"

  "My need to see your father at Rikers today."

  "What? Why the hell would you have gone out there to see him? What in God's name of a reason--?"

  "He wanted to know if there was any way for me to help you get the money to pay back the club without having to go through all of this mess with Chino and his son."

  "You know Chino?" I asked. She nodded. "And Nikko?"

  "I've never met him directly, no."

  "What the hell does that mean?"

  "I've never met him in person, Cheyenne -- I've never spoken to him. He doesn't know anything about me--"

  "I got that much." I eyed her from head to toe and squint with skepticism. "Rox asked you to help get me out of the same gigantic mess he helped me get into in the first place?! I guess that means he told you how all of this came about?!" She nodded again. "And you listened to every word of what he had to say?"

  "He was being open and honest and absolutely sincere about what happened to him and this money, and why--"

  "Bull. Shit. My God, you are still such a simple woman when it comes to him. One dick wag and you're all over it like boiling water on rice."

  She winced. "Excuse me?"

  "You heard what I said. That man has got you sucked right back into his bullshit like always, just like after my mother died."

  "Cheyenne--"

  "You were there when she took her last breath after tumbling from the back of that bike. You could've saved her with every skill you learned before dropping out of nursing school despite that bullet being lodged into her skull, and instead chose to wait by the sidelines while everyone else tried to stop the bleeding."

  "I was terrified like hell that night, little girl," she spat. "Don't get testy with me in forgetting who the hell you're talking to, and don't minimize what I went through just as much as anyone else."

  "I didn't forget who the hell I'm talking to, which is why I am," I retorted. "What you did was nothing -- What you have become since leaving is nothing beyond your son and this club. So why the hell are you back here?"

  "I was called back--"

  "To help me out with money that we both know you don't have -- money I'm certain he knew you didn't have either. Why else?"

  "Marleena--"

  "Bullshit. Why else?"

  She deeply exhaled while looking into my eyes with a blaze fiery enough to burn me at the stake she firmly believed I had always belonged. "You are still so angry with me for something I could never control--"

  "Such as your libido?!" I snapped. "You were hanging upside down from Rox's dick right before it happened."

  She raised her hand palm side up before lowering it back down to her side. "You've forgotten my stake inside this building."

  "I've forgotten nothing inside a building you no longer own. Nix bought you out -- I remember that shit clear as day."

  "You should, given what was happening with you at the time--"

  "Don't start with me on that." I sneered. "Your son being VP doesn't exactly erase any of this from memory."

  "Nor should it." She swallowed hard and feigned a smile through a glare. "Your 'love' for him is what I now realize was the only thing that managed to keep your tongue in check with me for all those years -- much more than it has today," she said, "which must mean that you've finally thrown your heart to someone else." She chuckled. "My, my, my -- what kind of spell has Chino's son managed to put on you?"

  "One that no longer allows me to see through the eyes of a whore."

  "What's going on?" I peeked over my shoulder as Taz stepped through the door, his eyes growing wide with a mixture of fear and wonder while moving between us; he gripped his hand around the knob and sighed. "We all good in here--?"

  "No," I replied. "Where the hell have you been?"

  He continued to shift his gaze and cleared his throat. "I needed to take care of some shit for the party tonight. 'D' didn't tell you--?"

  "She told me enough." As I turned to him, he gave full attention on his mother. "I need to talk to you in private about something important."

  "We can go in the back, it's quiet."

  "I don't want to be anywhere inside the club anymore right now -- I'd rather take it out if you don't mind." He nodded and stood back as I stepped past him and moved outside. "Thanks."

  After walking out behind me, he pulled the door closed and slapped his hands together. "What the hell were you and my mother going at it about before I came in, Chey?"

  "The usual. Nothing's changed on her end." I tossed my hair behind my neck while turning back to him and shrugged. "You know it's been a long damn time since I've seen her in person? Too long, but still not enough."

  "That's not what I asked you about, Cheyenne."

  "I know that, but I'm telling you anyway."

  "Why?"

  "In the off-chance that you'll eventually understand why I snap every time she rolls around out here. When the hell did she show up?"

  "Last night. One of the brothers called her up--"

  "Rox?" I asked. He remained silent. I deeply inhaled my growing frustration and dipped my head back to stare up at the sky. "Do you know that your mother went to see him today?"

  "She told me," he replied, his tone sheepish. "Mentioned the shit while we were talking."

  "And you don't think he's the one who called her?"

  "I don't know that shit--"

  "Did she tell you that he hit her up for money to pay back the club?"

  His brows furrowed as he blinked in surprise. "She didn't let me know about that."

  "Can you even begin to guess why?"

  "Nah, Cheyenne, I can't -- Can you?"

  "I could. If I thought it would matter to you either way."

  "What is that shit supposed to mean?"

  "That it doesn't matter." I rolled my eyes back to his and leaned my head aside. "Do you know anything about Rox going to the Gambiano's for cash first?"

  "What the fuck are you talking about?" He made a face at me as if I had suddenly split into two people right before his eyes. "Why would your old man hit up those two assholes for the cash to pay us back?"

  "No idea, but I plan to head back out to Rikers after leaving here yet again to find out; maybe he'll tell me about it, maybe he won't. But I was told they gave him the money--"

  "By who?"

  "That doesn't exactly matter so much as it does that he's now claiming he doesn't have it because he handed it all over to the club. Meanwhile, your President is claiming he never got anything and the result of me coming down here in the first place was because of it."

  "You think Snake is lying and got the money from Rox?"

  "I think Rox could be lying because it's what he does best, but I also don't think he would skimp on an opportunity to keep me from getting married to Chino's son. This shit with your mother showing up--"

  "She came back out here because of a brother."

  "Yes, the one asking her for money she doesn't have."

  "If he wasn't in need of money, Cheyenne, why the fuck would Rox call her up for it?"

  "He wouldn't, because we all know that she doesn't have it -- just as I said. But let's say for hypothetical sake it wasn't even him who called her up -- the rest aren't here to tell me otherwi
se. And my guess is when one of them finally do show back up, she'll be long gone again, which frankly might do us all some good, because have you actually missed her being around out here at all?"

  He grumbled. "Despite everything, she's still the woman who gave birth to my ass, Cheyenne, what the fuck?"

  "I'm just saying--"

  "You should stop before this shit turns into something else you don't want."

  "It already has." I pursed my lips to keep from going any further. "My point in coming back out here was to know if you were aware of the Gambiano's or that money, but it's obvious you're in the dark about most of this mess just as much as I've been."

  "Who told you about this shit?"

  "Like I said, it doesn't matter."

  "Which means Nikko must've run off at the mouth--"

  "And if he did?"

  "Nothing." He glared. "I can talk to Snake about it."

  "I'll deal with him myself, thanks."

  As I moved toward my car, he stepped forward. "Are you and that motherfucker still getting married?"

  "Stop asking me that question as if my options have changed when it's obvious they haven't and won't."

  "They could if that money is found and handed over to the club."

  "And you still have a secret way of making that happen?" I said. He became quiet. "Nikko would still need a wife to get Chino's money for himself."

  "He could find somebody else. Unless it's what you don't want..." He trailed off while waiting for an answer he knew would never come. "Cheyenne."

  "I can't think about that right now--"

  "'Cause you don't want to... 'cause you wanna be with this motherfucker regardless."

  "We are still getting to know each other beyond the craziness of our parents -- beyond his connections, beyond this damn club and rules set in place for everyone meant to be part of it or not."

  "You realize how much you keep avoiding everything I'm saying? Giving no straight up responses and spewing out bullshit to let the truth remain hidden."

  "What truth is that?"

  "I don't know, but you do, which is why you're doing every goddamn thing you can to keep it from spilling out between the same lips that were no doubt wrapped around his dick last night."

  "Okay -- You know what, fuck off, Malcolm." I pointed. "You're just as disgustingly hypocritical as your mother. I need to go."