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A Savage Kinda Love Page 14
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"The shit you're no longer feeling for what the fuck we could've had together is because of this asshole, Cheyenne."
"It's because I realized that despite thinking I needed you to fill up some empty part within myself before coming back, a black hole that I was certain could never be filled with the love of another person entirely, I was wrong."
"Because of this asshole," he retorted.
"Nikko isn't responsible for much of anything outside of allowing me to see with clear eyes that the hole inside myself no longer needed to be filled."
"Because it's no longer there?" He soured as I went quiet; his eyes lowered back down to the tin. "You're going back out there to see him."
"He asked. And nothing inside of me was eager to say no; at least not this time around."
"And what about the next?"
"I don't know yet... Hopefully, he'll be out by then."
"You're pinning a boatload of hope on some shit with this asshole that you're not even sure will ever make it past the edge of the goddamn shore, Cheyenne."
"That's a risk I have to take."
"One you're only willing to take with him."
"Maybe."
He dropped his hands back into his pockets while making his way down the stairs, then stood directly in front of me and stared straight down into my face as if I were a stranger to him; someone he used to know but wished he no longer had. "He asked you to bring those cookies too?" I frowned. "I could smell 'em as soon as you opened the goddamn door; your mother's recipe." I remained silent. He nodded, then shook his head and snickered. "Yet I'm supposed to take this shit not going beyond what's owed to the goddamn club."
He turned from me before I could respond and jumped onto his bike. I closed my eyes for a few seconds, then spun around to him as he flipped the engine and sped down the street without looking back.
I sucked in the air from his fumes before heading to my car and sliding inside. After slamming the door shut, I placed the tin in the passenger seat along with my purse, dropped back in my chair and blinked away a sudden rush of forthcoming tears before pulling away from the curb.
Chapter Thirteen
Satisfaction Guaranteed
Within a few hours of finally making it back to Rikers and being escorted into the family room, I heard the door creaking open with a smiling Nikko making his way inside.
"Hey there, baby."
"Hi." I dropped my hands from beneath my chin and stood up from the bench as the door closed behind him, then stepped around the table and nodded as he stared straight into my face. "They told me that you managed to secure this room for two hours. How the hell was that possible?" He grinned while moving forward in silence and tightened his jaw. I pinched my mouth while holding back a smile of my own, then took in a breath. "I don't really plan to be out here with you that long, but..." I lifted my eyes to his and exhaled. His lips parted as his tongue rolled between them. He lowered his hands in front of himself, placing one in front of the other as his dick pushed against his palm; he bit his bottom lip and flared his nostrils. "Nikko...?"
"Mm, what is it, baby?" His eyes drifted as my attention shifted to his mouth.
I took in another a shaky breath and gradually released it. "Why did you want me back out here again?"
"'Cause I wanted to see you, just like I said on the phone." He stepped closer to me and cleared his throat. "No other reason than needing to be in your space all over again."
"Needing to be in my space?"
"Yeah, baby, need. I like being here with you -- it's nice. A fuck of a lot nicer than the shit I'm currently dealing with back there. Speaking of which..." He deeply inhaled and swallowed it back. "You smell good as fuck today. What is that?"
"Lavender."
"Shit. You bathe with that or something?"
"Yes."
"Goddamn. Took a shower before coming out here to see me?" I said nothing in return as he chortled. "You know you look good, too -- real fuckin' good... that sweet skirt fitting in all the right places and white tank letting me see all I need from you--"
"Is that so?"
"Yeah, baby, fuckin' so." He grinned again. "You know that you are sexier than a motherfuckin' word I don't think I'm allowed to use inside the walls of this place when it comes to a woman without being hogtied for it."
"Well... that seems unfortunate."
"For me?"
"Yes. But..." I swallowed hard as he removed his hands from in front of himself, allowing me to see the full bulge in his pants. "Thank you either way."
"Always welcome for it from me, baby. Always goddamn welcome for it." When I lifted my eyes back to his face, his attention shifted to my breasts. As a wave of thirst lingered between us, I straightened my back and gulped again in gradually feeling myself succumb to the need for his eyes on me, as well as his hands. He grit his teeth while reaching for the edge of my tank and narrowed his gaze. "You wear this for me--?"
"No. It was the first thing I saw after the shower."
"Oh yeah?" I nodded. He arched a brow as his thumb brushed along the edge of the fabric, then chuckled and pulled back from me while bobbing his head. "Alright."
"Anyway, here." I leaned away from him and reached for the tin full of cookies on the table; I shoved it into his chest and grinned. "This is for you."
He peered. "You got something in there that could help get me out any sooner than whatever the fuck it is my old man has planned?"
"Not exactly. It's a few dozen chocolate chip cookies." His brows lifted in what seemed to be surprise, then lowered; the bridge of his nose crinkled in confusion. "When you mentioned them being your favorite, I thought maybe they'd be something you'd appreciate having in here."
"You remembered that shit?"
"It was only a few days ago that you told me. I don't think I'm old enough for my memory to give out on me that quickly just yet."
"That's not what I meant," he muttered; the whites of his eyes flushed as he swallowed. "Just that in between all the other shit, you remembered this one thing I said about myself."
"It seemed to matter to you."
"Yeah, baby, it did." His eyes dipped back down to the tin as he shook his head. "Not many people would've given a fuck in the same way about it."
"I'm not many people--"
"I can see that shit." He smiled, and for the first time since meeting, it felt more friendly than overtly sexual. "What store did you buy 'em from?"
"I didn't. I baked them myself."
"Yeah?"
"It's not a big deal. Especially when things like that give me time alone to think. I can be inside my own head while also concentrating on something else."
"Shit seems like a lotta goddamn work to me."
"It isn't. Taste them."
"Your cookies?"
"What else?"
"I could think of a few other things I'd like to taste from you, Cheyenne. Maybe at another goddamn time."
I sucked in my cheeks to avoid another smile while removing the lid. After placing it behind myself on the table, he reached inside for a single cookie, then winked at me before taking a bite from the edge. "What do you think about it?" My voice was helplessly enthusiastic, beyond hopeful that he would fall in love with what I had done. Why? I wasn't entirely sure.
"Goddamn." He took a few more bites until it was gone and dusted his hands of crumbs. "Where'd you learn to bake like that?"
"My mother baked from time to time while doing her best to keep me away from the stove until I was old enough, and would leave her recipes laying around. You liked the cookie?"
"Yeah, baby. Best goddamn thing I think I've ever managed to have on my tongue; at least for the time being."
I laughed aloud. "You really are too much."
"I don't think I'm enough, baby; not for you."
"I think you're plenty--"
"Is that right?" He stepped closer, brushing himself against me; I slightly turned to place the tin near the lid, and exhaled.
"You can have all of them if you want," I said, "or share them. I don't exactly know what all goes down in here when it comes to food after you leave this room, but the tin is for you."
"An entire goddamn batch just for my ass?" His eyes remained on my face as he continued. "Why?"
"To give you something, like I said. And maybe more to look forward to once you're finally out of here."
"You gonna bake for me, baby?"
"I could."
"More than just cookies?"
"Sure. There's cake, pie..."
"Cherry?" He lowered his face to mine and exhaled between my lips. I rolled the taste of chocolate across my tongue before swallowing it back. "You taste as sweet as those cookies?"
I guffawed and shook my head. "I've never been told one way or another if I do."
"Mm." A grin lit up his face as he dragged his hand along the edge of his jaw. "I bet you're fuckin' sweeter, baby... You know I could taste you right now if I wanted to find out how much?"
"You couldn't."
"Yeah, the fuck I could," he replied. "And you'd let me."
"You think?"
"I fuckin' know it, Cheyenne. You wanna see me try?" As his hand fell between us, the back of his fingers brushing against my breast before lowering straight back down to his dick, I moved away from him and crossed the room. The need to catch my breath while standing near the window heightened as a light chuckle escaped him. "When's the last time a man kissed you the way he's needed to, baby? The goddamn way you've needed it for yourself?"
"What?"
"When is the last time a man took your mouth to his and showed you what the hell it should feel like to be loved without words, Cheyenne?"
"I... I don't know. Never, I think." I brought a hand to my chest, resting it across my heart and shut my eyes.
Nikko moved in behind, pressing himself against me. "You've never had something like that for yourself?"
"No."
"You should." He bent forward and took in a breath. "I could give it to you, baby. All goddamn night if you asked for it. Just say the fuckin' words for me and I'll--" I spun around to face him and leaned into the window as his mouth hovered over mine; his eyes darkened as he wet his lips with the entirety of his tongue, and nodded. "Say the goddamn words for me, baby..."
"I..." He slid his hands beneath my arms and lifted me from the floor. I gasped as he sat me on top of the window sill and shoved himself between my legs, pressing the weight of his dick against the inner part of my thigh. He was harder than a wall made from concrete. My heart pounded against my ribs as my eyes darted across the room.
"They're not on," he muttered.
"What?"
"The cameras I know you're looking for, they're not on in here right now."
"And you can be sure of that?"
"Yeah." He rested his hands along either side of me, and grinned again. "I made sure we'd be alone in every way possible as soon as I secured the room."
"What were you expecting to happen between us in here, Nikko?"
He shook his head as his grin widened. "Just hoped it'd be something nobody else needed to see."
"Like what?"
"Any goddamn thing, baby... What were you expecting to happen when you showed up?"
"Outside of giving you the cookies? I don't know."
He pressed himself even harder against me and groaned; my imagination cluttered with thoughts of how he would feel against my bare skin. "You are so fuckin' warm," he said, the harsh whisper escaping from between his lips like a sin ready to meet my own. "So goddamn warm, baby--"
"Has, um--?"
"What?"
My attention shifted as my sex became heavy with each passing word; I cleared my throat. "Is Chino still unsure of when you'll be out?"
"He's hoping for soon, but..." He slid his hands behind my calves and pulled himself forward. "Jesus..."
"Nikko..." I stopped as he lifted his eyes back to my face and grazed his fingers across my skin.
"If everything he's been working on falls into place," he continued, "the shit should happen before the end of next week. You could use the time before then to finally move into my place."
"I'm still working on that," I told him.
"Green's prepared to help you in any way possible, Cheyenne."
"I know. I just..." He brushed the tips of his fingers along the edge of my skirt. "My God..." The jolt that rolled through my body nearly made me collapse into his chest. I adjusted my hips against the sill to keep from throwing my hands against him, and pressed my knees together. "I still need some time before making all of this official."
"I get that shit," he replied in a low voice, his fingers tickling the fabric of my skirt. "More than you might even know about it. But once I'm outta here, you know there won't be much left to be had?"
"Yes."
"Shit." He closed his eyes and grunted. "Say that again for me, baby -- what you just said, in the exact goddamn way."
"...Yes?"
"Shiiit." He leaned into me while pushing one hand beneath my thigh and sinking his fingers into my skin. "You feel me against you like that?" I nodded as he reopened his eyes, too damn powerless to respond with words. "That shit... I've thought about you every night since we first met, baby. But that night on the phone was something different in telling me what you weren't wearing..." He trailed off as the heat between us rose to damn near suffocation.
"I need to go--"
"No, baby, not yet. I don't get time for much else inside these walls... staring at a bunch of nothing -- at the goddamn ceiling while in bed."
"Is that where you..." I straightened myself and pressed my lips together before continuing. "Is that where you think of me?" He bobbed his head. "What did you think about after we hung up from each other, Nikko?"
He chuckled. "You're so goddamn eager to know this shit?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because I've... never had a man look at me in the that way you do," I told him. "I've never had one say things to me in a way that both terrify and make me feel so many things in so many places that I shouldn't."
"Are you wet for me now?" he asked, his brow arched as his tongue darted from between his lips.
I squirmed against the sill as my breath warmed and my skin flared with a heat only matched by the flames flickering up from hell itself. "Yes."
"If I touched you right now, baby, would you come for me?"
"Nikko--"
"Yes or goddamn no answer, Cheyenne." My toes curled inside my shoes as I closed my mouth and inhaled through my nose. "Goddamn, I wanna touch you, baby. Wanna know the feeling of that sweet, soft pussy all over my goddamn tongue. I know it's fuckin' sweet." He squeezed my thigh, then lifted his hand to my wrist and glided his thumb along the edge of my palm. "Never met a woman that made me wanna know her taste as much as you. Had we seen each other outside of here, before I made it in, I'd be begging for it more than I already am."
"Is that what you plan to do once you're finally out?"
"Once I'm finally outta here, baby, I won't need to," he replied. "You won't give me a goddamn chance for it."
"You're so convinced?"
"You're wet for me right now, Cheyenne -- the words outta your own goddamn mouth." He lifted my hand to his chest, pressing my palm against his heart. "The shit has been feeling irregular as of late."
"Maybe you should see someone about it."
"I'm seeing you right now." He dragged my hand to his stomach, stopping as my fingers reached the rim of his pants. "My cock wants to know the feel of your hand around it."
"I'm not doing that with you in here."
"Alright. But 'in here' means the shit is bound to happen outside."
"We'll see--"
"Yeah, the fuck we will, baby. The goddamn fuck we will."
He brushed my hand across himself before lifting it to his mouth and kissing the back of my fingers. While staring into my eyes, he winked, then released me and turned to the table.
>
"What are you doing?" I asked.
He reached for the tin and pointed his head toward the door. "Taking 'em with me when I go."
"You're leaving me alone in here... now? Why?"
"Give you some time to think before heading out for yourself."
"But... Think about what?"
"Us, baby. And everything you want this to be once I'm no longer confined."
"You already know what it'll be."
"I don't. And you think you might, but you don't know that shit either, Cheyenne."
I jumped down from the sill and fixed my skirt. "Why secure this room for two hours if being in here with me was only worthy of lasting for less than one?"
"'Cause I thought it'd be the amount of time needed to convince you of what I've got... didn't take all that much."
"Wha--?"
He winked at me and reached inside the tin for another cookie. After shoving one into his mouth, he walked to the door and knocked once. When it reopened, he eyed me one last time before strolling to the other side in silence.
I dropped to the edge of the nearest bench as soon as he disappeared and stared at the floor, flummoxed.
I knew before walking back into the room that this man was bound to ruin everything I had worked my ass off to leave behind four years ago. How much of it all, I wasn't entirely sure.
What's worse is that I was more than eager to let him do it in almost every way possible once he was out for good.
And with every part of himself willing to help make it happen.
Chapter Fourteen
Henceforth
I felt Nix's eyes on me as I finished taping the last box full of my clothes and placed it alongside him on the bed. "What is it?" I questioned, turning to him as he bent forward and slapped his hands together.
"Nothing."
"I don't believe that when you've been sulking in damn near silence since showing up to help me finish packing two hours ago; the latter of which you've actually yet to do."
He shook his head at me and shifted his eyes across the room. "I still think it's bullshit about you going to see that muthafucka again without telling us anything about it first, Cheyenne."
"I knew you wouldn't be able to let this go--"